serious post. you might cry.

i think i've figured life out.
HA! yeah right. jenna grace ricks will never figure life out. but a part of it has recently revealed its rearing ugly face. yes. that was a sentence with alot of r's. say it out loud. its sufficiently entertaining.
but, lets delve into my innermost thoughts. ready? ok.
so we start out as children, meandering through life, adhering to our responsibilites to grow teeth and walk and all that jazz. but as soon as the grand architect instills the ability to attain rational thought, life tells us its ok to tell children that there are super cool magical creatures that give us presents and candy but you cant see them ever because its the law of grownuphood. so we are subconciously incredibly envious of adults, who are in cahoots with the tooth fairy and santa and the easter bunny. this is when it all begins. we look forward to the day that we too will become BFF's with jolly old saint nick.
we get older. but now we've figured out that those things dont exist. so we look forward to the next age group. we are told that dating, driving and dressing ourselves is the shiz and that is the place to be age wise. but once we get there, we again are disappointed with the knowledge that driving gets old, dressing ourselves was riveting for the first 20 seconds until everyone else's clothes are better and dating is awesome until we fall too deep and get hurt. what do we do? our automatic programming makes us look up again to the age where we move out and fall in real love and can stay out passed 11:00. until living off top ramen gets dangerous to our health, our hearts are crushed into 7 million pieces and you have nothing to do after 11:00 besides study your butt off. and once we're married, kids take up all our time, and we sometimes wish we had no responsibility. it goes on and on.
this is what i call the viscious cycle of age and desire. and it is stupid. don't let it get you. because you'll find that being on your own means not having mom to make you dinner and make sure no one hurts you and driving is cool, but you secretly wish you can fit in your nephew's tonka truck. and being old means losing faith in the wonders of the unknown. and it all starts with the santa and the easter bunny.
you may be asking yourself a variety of questions at the moment.
1) why is jenna so friggin profound and amazing?
2) who does this chick think she is?
3) how does she know this?
4) can jenna read minds?
answer to all:   yes. :P
hehe no. i just have a different perspective. i know things from talking to my siblings. who are, because of my parents poor planning, are at all these different levels of life. i think this is just my really long and complicated way to say, growing up sucks.
ohhh goodness. and the dumb thing about the vicious cycle of age and desire is that we all know we're in it. but we cant help looking into the future with an overwhelming desire to rock it. cycles are dumb. no one ever wins.
so i think im gonna take this mess called life slow. because i have divine knowledge suckas. and i know that when im 30, im gonna wish i was right here sitting on the couch with my parents, txting my first boyfriend and blogging about things i think i know stuff about.


word of the blog
Lachrymose- (lack-ri-moe-ssssssss)- sad, tearful.
upon realizing that her butt was too large to fit into the toy car, her mood turned extremely lachrymose.

this post is about birds. and it could possibly be really lame or really funny. so. consider yourself warned.

i've always been taunted by the powers of flight posessed by our fine winged friends. until this weekend.

 guys, birds are stupid.

let me back up.

friday morning was my first day of spring break. yay for spring. eggs hatching, trees blossoming, children laughing right? well, yes. those things happen. but also, nature decides to be on excessive doses of happy pills. every creature with vocal systems wants to proclaim very loudly that it is in fact spring and they are in fact awake. which is fine.. except at 7:00 in the morn.

Friday morning i woke up to loud chirping. i rubbed my tired, insomniatic eyes and sought out the source of previously mentioned noise. my window is located directly above my bed. this has not been a problem of significant disturbance until now. a plump sparrow had positioned its battle station inches from my head. it was chirping at it's reflection. it was strutting its feathers seductively and prouncing around like a boss. yes everyone, this sparrow was trying to mate with its reflection. (conceited? yes.)  the realization of the potential emotional and mental trauma that could be inflicted, raced through my head. i watched the bird in silent horror, drawing up a game plan.

my first action: chirp back. i tried to chirp in the tone that would give off the "not interested" impression. but this determined little soul of a bird would not back down from his happily ever after. i proceeded to tap, press my face against the glass, scream, and other things that would scare a usual bird. but no. i decided to give up and go about my daily activities.

hours later i returned. the sparrow was still trying faithfully to win his dream girl. as i sat watching, another sparrow, of a more in shape variety, flew into obese sparrow's territory. to my digust, it too was trying to win the reflection. obese sparrow got a little power hungry (get it? hungry...) and straight up ghetto stomped skinny sparrow into the roof. well tried.

this is the ONLY thing that still made me want to be a bird: epic mid-air battles. we've all seen them. we've all secretly wished we could have one.

i was enthrolled in the dramatic fight. i watched them chase eachother around my property, suddenly disappearing and reappearing behind trees and houses. and then... they were gone.

my life had turned meaningless. i was intensely bored. and depressed. i want my sparrow soap opera back. so what did i do??
i chirped.
yes, i took of the indentity of the hot reflected sparrow and chirped for my warriors to return.
but it did not happen. and i started to worry. i knew obese sparrow couldnt last much longer. so i decided to lure them back. but how? what do birds like? well there was an obvious and inconveinent lack of worms in my room so that was out of the question. but then, i realized: birds like to sing! so began playing my sparrow friends music to invite them to return and duke it out over my window.
i started out pretty strong. thinking that some pumpin rap would attract them.

but B.O.B did not work his magic. i thought that might be a little too intense so i took it down a notch. whenever im in a pissy mood, i turn on my man michael buble. i love me some michael buble.

unfortunately, his silky voice did not make my birds return. i was about  to give up. my resources were exhausted and i didnt know what to do.
then it came to me.

yes i began singing. after 3 mintues of me singing jack johnson, my obese sparrow came back! it looked triumphant and determined as ever. skinny sparrow has yet to show himself. i do not care to know what happened to him.

i think this is the universe telling me that me and jack johnson should record together.
but anyways obese sparrow has been there for two days now. hopefully he doesnt get too physical with his attempts to woo my window. i'll keep everyone posted.



word of the blog time!!! you thought i forgot didnt you??

todays word of the blog: "Salubrious" (sa-loo-bree-ussss) : giving health/ good for one's health.

- " Wathing sparrows fight over a window is significantly salubrious"

Fulminate!!!! ..it'll make more sense later.... maybe.

there are so many things in my head right now. ahhh i feel like i'm going to explode.
first of all, i've made a decision. ready? it might change your life. probably not. but it could.
guys, i've been contemplating life again, as i often do. i decided that if i want to get spectacularly rich and famous off this blog, i should start posting things slightly more beneficial to other humans. i've been extremely selfish, i apologize.
so to be ridiculously helpful and conscientious of other people's needs, i am going to make a legit segment called, "word of the...blog" yes. kinda like the ever-helpful "word of the day" but not. because i don't post everyday and that would just be confusing to everyone involved. k ready? Exciting.

"word of the...blog" : Fulminate (Fuhl'..min' eight)- to issue a thunderous verbal attack. "the human fulminated against the cat's decision to exist." :)
use it today, i dare you.
 im kinda hyper right now, so im just gonna go with it. :)))
ok story time: once upon a time, in a little school down the road, (yes, i did once receive real public education) there was a second grade girl. this youngin was very serious about her education. she was aspiring to be a Veterinarian/ Princess, and was taking all the necessary steps to fulfill her life goals. one day, her teacher woke up and decided that it would be a good day to confuse the minds of innocent 7 yr olds. she put her plan into mischievous action. after an metally exhausting and agonizing lesson of long division, she called the class to attention and made her way over to the bookshelf. she spoke these words, "class, today we are going to learn about the wonders of the thesaurus."
the first thought that pulsed through our minds was, of course, "heck yes! Dinosaurs!" and we imagined all the possible unfortunate looking combinations of dinosaur that would make up the super cool thesaurus. finally the day was looking promising. but, no. she instead selected a huge book off the shelf that was not in fact about dinosaurs, but words. basically, a big fat book of disappointment. the mood turned solemn and gloomy. our fragile hopes of entertainment were devastated. this lesson evolved into an hour long lecture, filled with confusion, psychological deterioration, and sadness. ever since, we all shared a common hatred and distaste for this literary device.( sidenote: i think its funny thats there's no point in printing anymore of them because theyre now automatically imbedded into microsoft word. haha)
but today, i decided to make amends.
i went to my library at school, on a determined mission to appreciate thesauruses again, and forgive them for the mental torture that they had knowingly inflicted. i started with something small. "awesome."
the thesaurus once again, significantly disappointed.
listed as one of the "synonyms" for awesome. was... "hairy."
hairy? oh thesaurus. you will never be nearly as relevant or cool as a dinosaur.
unsuccessful day all in all, i suppose.

or was it?? :)